So Apple dropped two announcements this morning and didn't bother with an event for either one. No keynote, no livestream, no Tim Cook walking out to applause. Just a couple of press releases sitting on apple.com like they were updating a support page. I actually like that, weirdly, even though it means less to write about.
The bigger one, at least in terms of what people will actually buy: there's a new 9.7-inch iPad, $329 for the base 32GB WiFi model, and it quietly replaces the iPad Air 2. Not "iPad Air 3." Just "iPad." They dropped the Air name entirely, like it never happened. Given how thin and light that whole line always was, calling the new one just "iPad" feels almost like a demotion, or maybe a promotion, I honestly cant decide which.
32GB is still the entry point, which, come on. It's 2017. My phone has more storage than that and I mostly use it for podcasts and blurry pictures of my cat. Apple has been stingy about base storage tiers for as long as I can remember and I don't expect that to change just because the price dropped fifty bucks from what the Air 2 used to cost. If you want 128GB you're paying $429, and there's still no 64GB option in between, which is the tier most people actually want. It's almost like they want you to feel a little unsatisfied so you start looking at the Pro models instead.
That said — and I'll allow myself one honest concession here — $329 for an iPad that still has the A9 chip, Touch ID, and a proper Retina display is a genuinely good deal for what it is. My mom has been asking me for months what tablet she should get for reading the news and doing video calls with my sister, and this is probably it. Not because its exciting. Because its cheap enough that I won't feel bad if she barely uses it.
The other announcement is the (PRODUCT)RED iPhone 7 and 7 Plus, a red aluminum finish with a white front, launching this Friday, March 24th. $749 for the 128GB iPhone 7, $869 for the 256GB Plus. No 32GB option this time around, interestingly, so at least Apple's being slightly less cheap with the phone than with the tablet. A portion of the money goes to the Global Fund to fight AIDS, which is the whole point of the RED partnership and has been since Bono and company started it with the iPod years and years ago. I've never bought a RED product myself. I always mean to and then I end up buying the boring aluminum one because I'm indecisive about color choices in a way that's honestly a little embarrassing for a grown adult.
What strikes me more than either product is the format. Apple used to make a whole production out of stuff like this, even mid-cycle refreshes. Remember when a new iPod color got its own press event? Now it's a webpage and a couple of product photos and everyone moves on with their day. I don't think that's a bad thing necessarily, it's just a shift in how "news" gets made now, where the announcement and the news cycle around it happen almost entirely on Twitter within about four hours and then it's over.
Speaking of Twitter, it turns 11 today. March 21st, 2006 was the first tweet, from Jack Dorsey, "just setting up my twttr." Eleven years is a strange amount of time to sit with. It doesn't feel like a milestone birthday the way 10 did last year, but it's long enough now that an entire generation of people online have never known a world without it, for better or worse depending on the week you ask me. Some days I love it. Some days, especially lately with how the timeline's been going, I mostly just doomscroll through it before bed and regret it in the morning.
Anyway. New iPad on Friday if you preorder, and a red phone for the same day if you're into that. Nothing life-changing, just Apple doing routine housekeeping in the middle of March like it's nothing.